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Eowyn's Heart

The name of this blog is based on the character Eowyn from Lord of the Rings because I strongly identify with her on many levels. The purpose of this blog is to proclaim the glory of my Lord and King through His work in conforming me into the image of His Son, Christ Jesus. In all things, I trust you will see His hand at work.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005


Having had some really awful experiences with Dentists in past years, I've gotten into the habit of simply taking really good care of my teeth and only going to the Dentist office when there is a "need." (i.e., I don't go for regular teeth cleaning or annual exams). So far that's meant about 3 visits in the last 15 (or more?) years . . . the 3rd being yesterday.

A brief history to give you some perspective. When I was a child I had to have some major work done - to this day I don't really know what it is they were doing. It was like a scene out of an alien abduction movie. I would think it was just a nightmare if my mom didn't remember it as well. She remembers not being let in the room. I remember wanting her in the room and a black tarp placed over my mouth which was held open with some clamp thing and the tarp was used to hold the needles in place. I remember being terrified, I remember the needles hurting - alot - and I remember the doctors being angry and telling me to be quiet.

As an adult, about 10-ish years ago, I needed my wisdom teeth removed. The dentist who determined this was really nice, but he had to refer me to a surgeon to have the procedure done - all 4 teeth removed at once. I have a terrible fear of needles, had never had surgery on anything before, had never put under before, and never had an IV before. I got all these in one wack. I explained this to the doctor who seemed a little unsympathetic - he seemed to think I was being a little childish. It took them 3 tries to get the IV in - finally got a vein in the back of my hand - major ouch! When I came out of the drug-induced sleep I was sluggish and a little queasy - which, I think, was to be expected. The doctor & nurses were ready to go home. I was their last patient of the day and I'd taken entirely too long to wake up. He flat out told me that if I couldn't rouse myself enough to make it out of the building, he'd give me another shot (knowing I was terrified of needles)! This kicked in the adrenaline caused by fear and, with mom's helping arm, I staggered out of the office vowing never to visit a dentist again!

This past Monday, a piece of one of my molars broke off . . . a rather large piece. This was not unexpected as my fillings are all old and that particular tooth had a particularly large filling . . . plus, I like to crunch on the partially popped popcorn kernals - and we all know that's bad for teeth.

One of the guys at work recommended a dentist. As this particular co-worker can tend to be a whiner about anything that causes him the slightest discomfort, I figured there was a chance this doctor would be at least a little gentle.

I visited the dentist yesterday - and it was the best experience I've ever had with any physician of any sort! He wasn't really communicative - he was very focused on his work - but he was kind, and he did explain what I needed to know, and he was very, very gentle! I ended up needing a crown for the tooth. He explained what this meant. It took 3 shots, one in the roof of my mouth (ouch, but not overly much so) and after that I pretty much didn't feel a thing :-)

I have to go back in a couple of weeks to have the temporary crown replaced by a permanent porcelain one, but I have no fear of the impending procedure . . . in fact, I'm kinda looking forward to it :-) . . . that's partially because he said no needles would be required for this part of the process ;-)

So here's the conclusion. Fear must never be allowed to control our decisions. Our faith and trust must always rest in God to either keep us from harm or keep us through it. We must understand that our God is sovereign - only then can we take our childhood fears and find release from them in facing them through HIS strength.

Perhaps that seems a little disconnected from the dentist story, but it's not - it's the underlying lesson through it. I would not have been able to go to the dentist years ago to have my wisdom teeth removed if I did not trust God - it that case He carried me through the challenge. If I had let that experience deter me from trusting God in this most recent incident, I wouldn't have been able to have the positive experience of being protected.

All praise & honor & glory to HIM :-)

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

zero to 200!

A couple had been debating the purchase of a new auto for weeks. He wanted a new truck she wanted a fast little sports-like car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settledon any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range.

"Look!" she said. "I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in 4 seconds or less - And my birthday is coming up. You could surprise me."

For her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale.

Services are pending.

Sunday, October 09, 2005


This post may get me into some trouble, but it's weighing heavy on my heart today and I really must get it all on the table - or at least as much as I am able to for the moment.

This morning, a man that I have trusted to be a spiritual leader in my life said something that broke my heart - because it was not true - because it was not carefully handling the Word of God. Todays comment brought a fierce, violent upthrust of HUGE RED flags waving vigorously and my heart plumeted. As if this wasn't bad enough, it happened again, with a second individual - a man of God, whom I respect, totally denying what I have always considered an evident truth of Scripture and contradicting the teachings of the Senior Pastor in our church - openly - and only I spoke up against it - all others in the group swallowed these spoon-fed lies like honey.

My heart breaks at this.

Here is what was said. The first man, took us to Jude 20-21 as a reference verse for our study in Colossians, said (quoted as closely as possible but not verbatum), "People say when they sin, 'It's okay, God still loves me' - but that's not true. Here we are instructed to 'keep yourselves' in the love of God. . . If you sin, God does not love you - not in the same way."

This is a lie and a terrible misinterpretation of the Word.

Here is what the Scripture says about the love of God and sin: Romans 5:8 "But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 8:29-39, "For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. Moreover, whom He predestined, these He also called; whom He called, these He also justified; and whom He justified, these He also glorified. . . . Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?. . . . For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, or any other created thing shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Philippians 1:6, "being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ."

God's love is AGAPE love - unconditional, just like His grace and mercy - bestowed freely on those He has chosen. There is no "condition" upon which God can/will love me more or less. I did nothing to deserve His love in the first place and there is nothing I can do to temper it or change it or lessen it in any way. His love is freely and unreservedly and wholeheartedly poured out to me. Period.

Yes, sin, when I foolishly choose to indulge the flesh, creates a gap between me and my Lord. But it does not change His love for me in any way. Sin is a barrier I put up between God and I that hampers His hearing of my prayers - not because He loves me less or differently in my sin, but because the sin is such an offence that it receives His full attention first.

Consider what you do when you have a child that has asked for some bread - it's a legitimate request, breakfast was several hours ago and you know that child must be hungry - but that child has just drunk something you know to be deadly poison to her - something you had previously and frequently forbidden her to drink. What do you do first? Offer the bread?? NO! You get the kid's stomach pumped. Only when the life-threatening issue is taken care of do you hear the plea for a piece of bread. Sin is poison and dealing with it will always take priority for God in the lives of His beloved children. Does your love for that child change because she drank something you told her not too? God forbid it should be so!

What this man said about God's love being conditioned upon my sin or lack thereof, borders on works-based Christianity. Re-read the Romans 8:29-39 passage again - better yet, read the whole thing out of your own Bible. Then read Romans 8:1-10, "There is therefore NO condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who walk do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit . . . But you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. Now if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not His. And if Christ is in you, the body is dead because of sin, but the Spirit is life because of righteousness."

Works will not get you into heaven. IF you are His child - There was NOTHING in you or that you did that caused God to choose you and there is NOTHING you can do to cause Him to reject you. His work was *complete* on the cross - He is THE way, THE truth and THE life - no one comes to the Father but by Him.

Now, some will take this and say (as did the Romans) - so then, once we are saved we can sin all we want and our place in heaven is secure. Such a statement reveals a total lack of understanding about what salvation truly is. And this is where we get into what the other spiritual leader in my church said that broke my heart.

He said we have a "sin nature." I boldly spoke up and said, no, we only have one nature (refrencing II Cor 5:17), "old things have passed away; behold ALL things have become new" - when we sin it is because we have heeded the flesh, not because of a sin nature. I was immediately and decisively shut down with refrences to "imputed righteousness" and the self-evident battle we all face daily against sin. At that time, the Holy Spirit reminded me of the Scripture that commands a woman to be silent in the church (I Cor 14:34), so I held my tongue . . . and I wept.

Let's go back to II Corinthians 5:17, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a NEW creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new." Then Romans 8. The whole chapter is well worth a read through, but I want to pull out verses 9 & 10, "But you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. Now if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not His. And if Christ is in you, the body is dead because of sin, but the Spirit is life because of righteousness." If we also reference Romans 8:29-30 and then Romans 7:15-25 where Paul clearly shows us that our "nature" - the NEW nature of the Believer, is to desire to do righteousness, "with the mind I myself serve the law of God . . ." then we begin to see that a truly redeemed child of God, will not seek opportunity to sin banking on their eternal security in Christ. A truly redeemed child will SEEK - will DESIRE - will WORK to honor God in all things.

Will we continue to sin? Unfortunately, yes. Our flesh is still with us - it is part of us until we are changed either through death or through the rapture when Christ clothes us with incorruptible bodies. It is strong . . . and some might consider it the "sin nature." But it is no longer our nature - it is now a responsibility. A tool to mold us more into the image of Christ. Every time we come up against the desires of the flesh and choose righteousness, we affirm HIS work in our lives. Everytime we fail and follow the desires of the flesh, we are driven to our knees in humble repentance, and so doing, demonstrate the grace and mercy of our loving Lord to forgive, to teach, to strengthen and encourage. In this we say of our sin, with Paul, "But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. For I know in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find."

Here then is the glorious conclusion: I had nothing to do with my salvation. I have nothing to do with maintaining God's love for me. Moreover, I have nothing to do with growing in spritual maturity (Philippians 1:6). It is ALL of GOD and God ALONE. I have no glory to claim in the beginning, middle, or end of this process because it was and is not of me. Now, having been found a recipient of His gracious mercy, I strive ever more to honor Him in all that I think and say and do. Ever mindful that the flesh in which I dwell is in rebellion against Him, I constantly seek to know Him more - having my mind renewed (Ephesians 4:17-24, esp. v 23; Colossians 3:10; Romans 12:2) so that I might successfully run the race set before me - buffeting my flesh and making it my slave.

God begins the process. He makes the spirit of the believer alive to righteousness and, in so doing, sets in motion the natural processes that will accomplish His work - to perfect us into the image of His Son.

Will He Jump?

This is a great blonde joke :-)

Homer, a handsome man, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 pm. He sat down next to this blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The 10:00 news was on.

The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump.The blonde looked at Homer and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"Homer says,"You know, I bet he will."The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."

Homer placed $20 on the bar and said, "You're on!"Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death. The blonde was very upset and handed her $20 to Homer, saying, "Fair's fair. Here's your money."

Homer replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 o'clock news and knew he would jump."

The blonde replies, "I did too; but I didn't think he'd do it again."
Homer took the money.......

Saturday, October 01, 2005


I was on the phone with my mom today when she said "Oh, Look! Benjamin just took his first steps!!!" <> a few moments later she says, "I think he just said 'da-da'!" Sure enough, he got on the phone and said "da-da-da-da" :-D

Oh, how I wish I was there!!!!

(for those who don't know - Benjamin is my nephew, the first son of my brother, who is also my very best friend in the whole world - they live too far away to visit often and I miss them)


They're painting the outside of our building. Logic would tell you to do that when normal people are at work, but whoever scheduled the work for today was not using any common sense whatsoever :-P

My windows are covered in plastic so the sun can't come in (something I cherish on Saturdays since I'm in-doors all week at work) and the fumes come in under the door, so I'm headachy and stuffy :-( On top of that, the machine they're using emits a high pitched, fairly consistent screech - ughhh!

On the plus side, I used some wonderful planning skills I learned at work and am now working my way through a productive morning :-) I had a lot of things running around in my head to get done and was able to focus them down to what is really important and then to lay out my day so it is actually doable :-) I haven't stuck to it 100% - getting sidetracked a little here and there by things I "want" to do rather than focusing on the things I "need" to do - but, for the most part, I am being pretty successful in meeting my goals thus far :-)

Speaking of which . . . time to get off this side-track and back to balancing my checkbook :-)